Darren Roberts

An important part of our personal development is the view we have of our self. In fact, this is extremely important. You need to like who you are now and have at least a similar vision of respect for yourself as you take your chosen path.

No one can take too many steps towards their goals, dreams and aspirations without liking the person they currently are. A lot of this revolves around honesty.

You probably wouldn't go into the local newsagent with the view to shoplift your favorite magazine or newspaper. It goes against your values and standards. It is also illegal with severe repercussions. One view of success I recently read and strictly adhere to is "you can do anything you like as long as you don't hurt anybody else". What an excellent analogy! In this example, shoplifting would hurt the newsagent proprietors, as you would be doing the wrong thing by them (and more than likely, yourself too).

Similarly, you must feel comfortable using today as your starting point to attack your life plan. Everyone needs a starting point and today is the first day of the rest of your life. Respect can be almost equated to esteem. To have respect for something or someone means you hold a special regard for their talents and/or abilities. This special regard reflects your very own values and standards. It also shares what you believe in and, in part, what you see or would like to see in yourself.

Quite often, we see traits in others we think the world of, but don't really give it a second thought that we could possess these very traits ourself. Unfortunately, many can only see these good points in others. They either fail to look at what they have themselves or what they can do to acquire these traits they have the utmost respect for.

For example, when I first went into telephone sales a number of years ago, my team leader/boss at the time possessed incredible talents on the telephone. The job involved cold calling the Marketing Directors of various companies throughout Europe selling advertising space to different industries.

His power of persuasion was magic. His enthusiasm was electric. His sincerity sung through his sales pitch with bells on. On top of all this he had a firm belief in what he was selling and stood behind it 100%. This ensured customer satisfaction was delivered as he promised it would be. His talents have made him a rather wealthy man. I respect him incredibly. I tuned in to his methods. I listened to him, gradually learning his techniques. I used them and developed them to better suit my style. As I did this, I began succeeding at the same tasks he was already doing. Hey, everything is easy... once you know how!

Had I not been of the belief that I could do any of it and simply asked him to close my deals for me, I would never have succeeded. To develop your abilities you need to have faith in yourself; a belief that you can is a necessity. You also need to have as much respect for yourself as you do for your mentor. This goes back to what we said earlier, "You must like who you are today".

You must look in the mirror and be proud. If you are combing your hair one morning, take a moment to stare at yourself. Doing this should create a moment of honesty. You may briefly feel uncomfortable. Deal with it and look further. What do you think? Is this person cool? Does this person repulse you? Does this person have what it takes to deliver on large commitments to you?

This has everything to do with self-confidence. It is beyond the scope of this report to delve deeply into this aspect, as it is noteworthy of an entire book in itself. It may be something I can put together for you in the future. Self-confidence affects every one of us and if you can't look at yourself and be proud, then you are the person you are hurting. It will obstruct your growth and hold you back. Negative self-image must be overcome to succeed.

You are where you are today due to your previous decisions. Concentrate on the positives - develop them further. Minimize the negatives - they are killers! You deserve respect! You have read this far! You know how important it really is! Those people, you don't respect, are those that you will have little to do with.

Since you'll be spending a lot of time with yourself, it makes good sense to respect this person. It's all about knowing and understanding who and what you are. We have already mentioned how much this has to do with honesty. It's about being very honest with yourself. You will find a proportional link between honesty and self-respect.

© Darren Roberts
The above is an excerpt from Darren's new book called:

"Making Your Success Inevitable"

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